Fish Ratings has affirmed The Fish You Heated Up in the Office Microwave’s long-term fish rating at ‘D’. Your colleagues remain deeply distressed.
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You now have access to Fish Ratings PRO!
Dear subscriber, Your access to Fish Ratings has been discontinued. But don’t worry, you now have access to Fish Ratings PRO, powered by AI (Aquatic Intelligence™)! At Fish Ratings, we’ve always prided ourselves on going under the surface to provide deep dives into fish analytics: beyond facts, beyond data, beyond reality. For years, we haveContinue reading “You now have access to Fish Ratings PRO!”
Fish Ratings Places Cantonese Steamed Tilapia on Negative Watch But Open to Proposals
Fish Ratings has placed Cantonese Steamed Tilapia’s ‘BB-‘ rating on Negative Watch after poor reviews from bloggers on WeChat and Weibo but could be persuaded not to downgrade the fish, perhaps, if a mutually beneficial agreement could be reached, if you know what we mean.
Fish Ratings Upgrades Predatory Trumpetfish to ‘BBB+’ on Latest Accusations of Deceptive Behaviour
ish Ratings has upgraded Trumpetfish’s senior rating to ‘BBB+’ from ‘BBB’ with a Positive Outlook after reviewing the latest research into the fish’s immoral and duplicitous behavior, which may actually improve its chances of re-election, uh, we mean survival.
No Rating Impact on Fish Fondue from Social Media Speculation
Recent widespread speculation on social media about the viability of Fish Fondue will not have any impact on the Swiss seafood recipe’s rating.
Fish Ratings Downgrades Gilt-head Bream to ‘AA-’; Negative Outlook
Fish Ratings has downgraded Gilt-head Bream’s Long-Term Fish Default Ratings (FDRs) to ‘AA-’ from ‘AA’ following several cases of a little understood form of indigestion. The Outlook is Negative.
Fish Ratings To Withdraw Ratings On Russian Fish
Fish Ratings – Moscow – 23 Mar 2022–On March 15, 2022, the European Satirical Fish Evaluation Oversight Board announced a ban on providing arbitrary ratings to fish in Russia. In light of this, Fish Ratings will withdraw all of its outstanding ratings on relevant fish before April 15, 2022, the deadline imposed by the ESFEOB.Continue reading “Fish Ratings To Withdraw Ratings On Russian Fish”
Fish Ratings Affirms and Withdraws Ratings on Fried Filet of Fish Sandwich and other Fish Items on Eisenberg’s Menu
Fish Ratings has affirmed the Fried Filet of Fish Sandwich on the menu of Eisenberg’s Sandwich Shop at ‘A+’ and simultaneously withdrawn the rating following the reported closure of the classic lunch counter and delicatessen.
Global Fish Outlook – 2021
The past year has been a tumultuous one for global markets, politics, science and culture, but most of all, of course, for many species of fish.
Fish Ratings Downgrades Common Ling to ‘B’; Outlook Negative
Although you have a robust cash flow
A single-B rating is all you will get.